Crash Course on Marriage

The older I get, the more I realize that counting on an ideal situation is ludicrous. There are just too many factors going in--other people, the weather, etc.--and though you can remind some of them, you cannot control any of them. And don't forget that you are imperfect, too. The good news is that this makes the end result pretty hilarious.

good-lookin', right?

For weeks before my wedding, my mother had been worried about what to do with my hair. I long ago realized that I can't "make" it do anything, but we agreed I'd wear it in curling rags the night before. It turned out lovely, I successfully did my own makeup, and we were out the door and driving to the Salt Lake Temple for the wedding ceremony pretty much on time.

And then I realized I forgot my dress.

One would think, since I forgot my dress before my bridal shoot and had to drive back (a whole 12 minutes) to get it, that I would not repeat the mistake.

Nope.

And this time, the drive back was an hour, not 12 minutes. We frantically called my father (who was leaving later) and shouted through the car phone to get my dress AND the flowers [because we didn't have those either].

Fortunately, the temple allows for fudge time when you schedule a marriage ceremony, so I got in my dress on time as we waited for family and friends to be seated.

Mark and I entered the sealing room where the ceremony would take place with no hitch [that would come later, hahaha], but when the sealer began with an announcement of marrying Daniel and Sara, every one of our family and friends looked confused. Mark goes by his given name, not his middle name, and I go by my nickname, not my given name.

We corrected him.

After the sealing, the tricky photography juggle began--the Salt Lake temple usually has 80 weddings on a single day, but fortunately our wedding day only had 22.

We also had to distribute the flowers, but since I hadn't seen the flowers before (nor specified certain flowers for groomsmen v mothers), I ended up pinning what was probably a corsage onto Mark's jacket. We switched it to the special boutonniere after I realized my mistake, but let the remaining corsages/boutonnieres to be distributed without distinction to title.

Note that my parents (on right) are wearing the same-style flower thing

Between shots of bridal party groupings, a runaway toddler from a separate wedding party high-speed waddled with a sole squeaker shoe across our path. Good comic relief to a usually tedious procedure (although I was euphoric, so no complaint). Our photographer did a great job handling it all.

There were no problems with the luncheon, so I'll just say that it was DELICIOUS and move on. Remember that it's the errors that makes these things funny.

Mark and I checked into our hotel before the reception that night so that we could drop off our luggage, but at that point I was so tired I had fallen off cloud 9, so even though we told the receptionist that our wedding had brought us to the city, we weren't exactly showing it. So I took a nap. Duh.

That sort of made us cut it real close in arriving at our reception. My father texted me a couple minutes before the reception--held at my parents' house--to 'remind' me that my own reception would start soon.

Wearing heels all the rest of the day (which also made me sink into the grass in the pictures) gave me blisters, but I hadn't brought any other shoes [besides hiking shoes], so my mother sent me to her closet to pick out something to more properly cover my feet. The only pair of her shoes that fit me were her appropriately-sage-green bedroom slippers. So that's what I wore at the reception, along with my wedding dress.

Which really should have clued people in that I was the one that had gotten married, but I guess some of these details slip through people's minds, because my sister Rachel was congratulated, and the same person told Mark that she--pointing to Rachel--was a wonderful girl. He responded that this was true, but he married THAT one (pointing to me). This is all the more funny because Mark had also gone on a couple dates with Rachel [which is a story for another time].

The next day, we made the drive up to Idaho for a reception in Mark's hometown. He was sleepy, so I drove most of the way. I woke him up to advise him that we had just passed a recent accident of a van on its roof in the ditch, but that there were plenty of helping bystanders, and that I could see the emergency vehicle heading their way.

Turns out that van was his parents.

Also turns out that his mom broke her neck. [i will add that she is doing fine. but we didn't know that yet]

That kinda ruined the whole festive mood at the reception, not helped by the fact that I didn't know anyone there anyway. I shook people's hands and we would say to each other "I'm so sorry."

Not the best thing to say after a marriage.

The next day, after being reassured that she was fine, Mark and I drove off to Yellowstone for a short vacation. Absolutely a blast. And no, we weren't the ones that stuck the bison calf in the back
of the car.

For some reason, on the return drive to Idaho, I was really ill. I slept the whole way, and continued sleeping until 4pm when my fever of around 102 [measured by a mother's hand, not a thermometer] broke. 

Life. It's a bowl of cherries.

Once returning to Texas, we spent the rest of my time off work looking for an apartment [we found one. yay!] and packing up Mark's apartment in College Station. That part all went smoothly, but when we tried to drive the UHaul--packed with his life--back to Houston, we were faced with

flattened. by wind

a) a tornado that ripped up trees, fences, roofing, etc. and blocked the road with the detritus--requiring service men with heavy equipment to clear the way;

b) serious flooding--no, like REALLY serious flooding, requiring the emergency vehicles to respond via boat--that blocked off so many roads, downed power lines, and devastated homes; and

a crane is lifting up that semi-truck. yeah, a crane.

c) the crashes caused by the above two. We passed 3 downed semi-trucks in the space of a half mile. Multiple other cars stalled, flooded, and were otherwise totaled;

All of which turned our typical 90 minute drive to an 8 hour stress-filled journey.

That has been my first two weeks of marriage. 

I'm still hanging on.

:)