One flew over the cardiac floor

Sometimes, when you work so much, not only do you think everything is way more frustrating or funny, but you also do funny things.

One of our residents, after having a stretch of us calling him every hour or so (hey, it was legit), wrote an order that a patient could have ice chips, as long as the ice chips don't melt. Thanks for that. It made us laugh.

Then there's one of my patients that I had all weekend. He was very, very forgetful, but he never forgot who he was, and he never forgot who I was. At one point, he said that we were getting to be quite intimate. That was as I was scooping some of his poop into a specimen cup to test it for bacteria. I wanted to laugh, but I actually didn't want to do any extra breathing at that moment.

My other patients were also cracking me up. Or cracking my sanity. Hard to say.
My elderly patient had initially come in with confusion, so I would check if he knew where he was, who he was, and when it was. It got to the point where I'd show up in his room, and he'd say without prompting "My name is [xxxxx]. ask me again and I'll tell you the same." I told him I'd come up with harder questions.

My only female patient had pain control problems, and so was on an epidural pump, an IV pain pump, and several other pain meds. This unfortunately led to urinary retention, so to avoid inserting a foley catheter, her nurse practitioner ordered a medicine that is commonly given to men with prostate issues, but has been found to be helpful in females with difficulty urinating. So I told this to my patient as I gave her the drug. Later she called one of the other nurses in her room and told her that her prostate medicine was making her sweat. This really confused my co-worker.

We are all going crazy.

I discovered that the bottom of a container of liquid tylenol fits snugly into the underside of our medicine cups. I shared this epiphany with a co-worker.
She wasn't impressed.